There are some things babies do that we just cannot comprehend. Though she gets four full bottles and two solid meals a day, somehow my lovely six-month-old will turn into a fire-breathing dragon whenever I *dare* to lay her down for a minute in order to prepare her bottle. A process that will take less than a minute, but to her, the world is ending right there and then.
The room is once again sandblasted by the bone-piercing cries and screams of a baby who believes I put her down for fun. When I get back to her and pick her up, she will be all red, and two huge tears will be on her cheeks. With a big sigh of relief, she’ll stretch out her little arms once she sees the bottle and grabs it as I bring it closer.
Two weeks ago, during a moment like this, I was just shaking my head and thinking why my baby was still displaying this behaviour. My heart actually kind of hurt because of the sadness and drama each time. I kissed her forehead as she drank from the bottle, the tears still on her cheeks, and said: “There’s no need to cry. Don’t you know that I will always feed you?”
And I meant what I said. Hell would literally have to freeze over before I’d wilfully let my own child starve. But if my baby knows that I love her, which I hope she does and feels safe with me, then why the disbelief and impatience every time she has to wait for a minute?
As I pondered this, I realised it’s probably pretty much what God must be experiencing when we express our needs to him. When we need or desire something, we must have it on the spot. Right now, preferably. And if not now, then at least next week. Or next month. Maybe even next year. But that’s as far as our flexibility goes, usually.
Now I don’t mean to make light of the things we ask from God, because, as you and I both know, the human heart can suffer greatly through unmet needs. We ache.
I’m thinking of those who are living off welfare programmes and benefits and trying to keep a roof over their heads. When will that job come around, Lord? When will we be able to save up for something instead of see our accounts drained deep into the red? The 41-year-old man who has been praying to finally meet and marry a kind, loving, caring partner, but to this day is still falling asleep to the noise of a quiet house.
When and where am I going to meet her, Lord? Come on, is she even out there? The mother sees her grown son still addicted to drugs and praying for him to turn around and find the Lord. When will you help him out of that ditch, God? When will he finally be safe?
The woman who is holding her gazillionth pregnancy test, hoping that this might just be that month, but after staring at it for ten full minutes realizes that the second line is just not going to appear, even though she could have sworn that she saw the faintest of lines on yesterday’s test. I can’t do this anymore, Lord. I just can’t. But I have to. I am losing it. When are you going to step in?!
When is God going to step in, exactly? I don’t know about you, but some of the most gut-wrenching pain this world has to offer will occasionally stop me in my tracks and make me tear up. When, Lord, when?! This plea, this cry for intervention in our broken lives, reminds me of the current uprising in the US against white supremacy and racism.
It also the words of Martin Luther King in his famous speech ‘How Long, Not Long’: “Somebody’s asking, ‘When will the radiant star of hope be plunged against the nocturnal bosom of this lonely night, plucked from weary souls with chains of fear and the manacles of death? How long will justice be crucified, and truth buried?’
I come to say to you this afternoon, however difficult the moment, however frustrating the hour, it will not be long, because ‘truth crushed to earth will rise again.’ How long? Not long, because ‘no lie can live forever.’ How long? Not long, because you shall reap what you sow.’”
1965 was the year this speech was delivered. 55 years ago. A long time. Do you think Martin Luther King had expected racial injustice to have stretched far into the next century? And yet, full of faith and hope for change, he spoke of ‘not long’. What was his secret? Was it his faith in the goodness of man? I think he may have known better than that. It may well have been the goodness of God that MLK was lifting his eyes towards.
Perhaps it is exactly our faith in the goodness of God that still makes us cry out. That still has the tears run down our cheeks. That still captivates us with strong chains of disbelief that our deepest desires have not turned into reality. Perhaps my daughter was crying so hard because she couldn’t believe that I was putting her down when she was so obviously hungry.
And even worse, I didn’t just put her down and delay the feeding, I even disappeared out of sight. Isn’t that what God does, too? When we start asking for the things we want, he suddenly seems to be off the radar. Not only do our deepest needs go unfulfilled, the One we cling to for comfort in our time of need decides to leave the scene altogether. Or so it seems.
An eternity of tears to us, maybe only a minute to Him. To quote scripture, 2 Peter 3:8 says: But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: with the Lord, a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. Now surely, God understands our world and our perceptions and knows that our wait can seem to last forever. Our waiting hurts. And if you’ve ever heard the begging cries of a baby, you know that even a minute is too long.
In Psalms 56:8, we read: You have taken account of my wanderings; put my tears in Your bottle. Are they not in Your book? God knows, and counts every tear. Jesus got his fair share of waiting pains too. Firstly, he had to watch this broken world do its damage for the first 30 years of his life before He could step in and openly do something about it.
He witnessed his own people misuse God’s commandments on a daily basis and twist them so as to justify their own misdemeanors. And let’s not forget, He lived his entire life in anticipation of an excruciating physical death and the darkest battle our realms have ever seen.
So I just want to encourage you. I don’t know where you are right now, but I know that God cares. And He does make himself present in your situation, even if you don’t feel it. When you’re faced with an empty bank account and don’t know how to feed the family, He is there. When you don’t know if your heart can handle another loss, He is there.
When your child comes home bullied and beaten, and your own heart bleeds with agony, He is there. When your neighbor proudly shows off her new baby and you outwardly smile, but inwardly are about to break down, He is there. He will not leave you or forsake you, no matter what happens. Don’t you know that I will always feed you? Dry your tears, and be on the lookout. Surrender as best you can. Something good is coming your way.
Lamentations 3:25-26 The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.
God bless,
Annelies.
Click here to watch the video on youtube